Generally, I'm not a fan of modern beat-em-ups; I liked the Streets of Rage series for the Sega Genesis but that's about where my fascination with fighting hordes of the same bad guys ended. That said, I've always been a fan of the God of War games because I feel that the break the cycle and introduce new elements to make their games interesting. While Chains of Olympus is nowhere near as ground-breaking as its predecessors, it does what it does really well, and looks graphically incredible while doing so, truly pushing the PSP to its limits.
As I just said, this game is fiiiiine-looking. I've always known that the PSP is capable of some pretty incredible stuff (for a handheld), but I never could've imagined a PSP game with this much attention to detail, textures and animations this smooth, and character-models this... un-polygonal, I suppose? CG cutscenes are done with an interestng-but-effective combination of 3D models (usually just Kratos and whoever he's talking to) and 2D "cardboard cutouts", as it were, of such things as soldiers and townspeople. There's blood aplenty, and it often suprises me how steady the framerate stays despite the constant flow of the stuff along with the red aftertrails of Kratos' signature weapons, the Blades of Chaos.
Speaking of weapons, you'll find plenty of additions to your already-formidable movelist to keep gameplay fresh. Aside from simply finding new weapons and magic spells (Efreet is my favorite spell; you'll see why if you buy the game), you can also upgrade your existing weapons and abilities with Red Orbs which are dropped by defeated enemies and found in treasure chests. Even weapons and abilities that initially seem useless can become quite deadly once you've got several new moves to try out on the next unfortunate Persian soldier that gets in your way.
Sound quality is wonderful. Everything, from massive explosions to the brutal sounds of swords piercing armor and flesh, is spot on. What's more, the voice acting is quite good-- Linda Hunt as the narrator, in particular, really helps draw the player into the game, and T. C. Carson is effectively moody and vengeful as Kratos.
Unfortunately, this awesome-sounding package does come with a few hitches. Rather than attempting to cut off pathways with in-game obstacles, the developers instead chose to use invisible walls ad-nauseum. What's more, the in-game obstacles that are used seem rather cheap; a satyr bombarding me with what are effectively Molotov cocktails every time I try to open a door is more annoying than it is effective.
Despite its flaws, God of War: Chains of Olympus is still a wonderful gem of a game, and a must-have if you're looking to bolster your PSP library.
The Rundown
Graphics: 10/10. There hasn't been a game that looks this good on any handheld system to date.
Audio: 10/10. Realistic sounds, accompanied by good voice-acting? Doesn't get much better.
Controls: 10/10. You'll be destroying entire armies with relative ease before you know it.
Gameplay: 8.0/10. Overuse of invisible walls and annoying obstacles got on my nerves.
Overall: 9/10. Buy it. Seriously. You will not regret it.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Oxygen
Another review request. Thanks to gameandwatch9!
Before I start this review, let me get a few administrative things out of the way:
This is actually one of the harder reviews I've done so far. You see, even though I've been breathing in oxygen my whole life (and hopefully, so have you), it's not really something I actively think about. In fact, it happens pretty much automatically; I can stop breathing if I want to (though I wouldn't really recommend doing that), but if I'm not actively trying to stop myself, my lungs basically do their own thing. All the better for me, I suppose; the less work I have to do on top of college, the better.
Now that I do think about oxygen, however, it seems to me that our dependence on it is quite annoying. Think about all the things we can't do without assistance because we're so oxygen-dependant: scuba-diving, snorkeling, spelunking, and space exploration all require some form of oxygen tank or method of obtaining oxygen. Wouldn't all those things be so much more fun if we didn't have unwieldy stuff strapped to ourselves the entire time?
What's more, we are constantly threatened by dangers such as carbon-monoxide poisoning and lung damage because we breathe in order to absorb oxygen. How many movies have you seen where some sort of deadly gas is being released into a room or a car or something, and the protagonist is racing against time to thwart the villain because he'll eventually have to breathe in? Our potential vulnerability due to this weakness has even caused certain security companies to create carbon-monoxide monitors, which we then have to buy in order to be safe, wasting precious money that could be used on a myriad other things if we didn't need oxygen so badly.
That said, there are benefits to oxygen, and the benefits far outweigh any minor inconveniences. The thing that immediately comes to mind for me is fire, or, more specifically, burning things. Think back, for a moment, to science class: I assume that at some point your teacher did the experiment where you use a vacuum pump to suck the oxygen out of a glass jar with a candle inside? The candle goes out because there's no oxygen in the jar; in a sense, fire is as dependant on oxygen as we are.
When you think about it, a lot of what we do involves using fire to heat or burn things at some point or another. When I cook, for instance, I must light a fire. What would happen to the culinary industry if oxygen wasn't there to help start the fire? (Actually, I'd probably be eating a lot more sushi, which would be awesome and a good deal healthier than my current diet, but that's neither here nor there.) Another example is power. My laptop is currently connected by a power cord to a surge protector, which is connected to the wall, and, eventually, links up with whatever power plant supplies energy to my college's residence halls. I'm fairly certain that said power plant generates electricity by burning something, though I'm not sure specifically what.
In retrospect, I suppose oxygen is something like a double-edged sword. While our need for it can often be frustrating, it makes life a little more livable at the same time.
The Rundown
Convenience: 6/10. We can find oxygen in most places we need to go, but for extra exploration, special gear is needed. Also, oxygen makes things rust, which isn't convenient at all.
Necessity: 10/10. We need it to live. Can't get by without it.
Helpfulness: 10/10. Cooking food, combustion engines, and certain kinds of power plants wouldn't be possible without fire, which, in turn, wouldn't be possible without oxygen.
Ease of Absorption: 10/10. Like I said, it pretty much just happens.
Overall: 9/10. Yep. Oxygen's pretty sweet.
Before I start this review, let me get a few administrative things out of the way:
- I now post a new review once a week, generally every Friday, so now you'll know when to check this site. (I might do some reviews in between, though, so don't forget to check the archives.)
- My inbox is awfully empty. Keep sending in those review requests! The e-mail address you should send them to is on the right-hand side of the blog, under "About Me", I think.
- Edit: Anonymous users can now post comments! Post away!
This is actually one of the harder reviews I've done so far. You see, even though I've been breathing in oxygen my whole life (and hopefully, so have you), it's not really something I actively think about. In fact, it happens pretty much automatically; I can stop breathing if I want to (though I wouldn't really recommend doing that), but if I'm not actively trying to stop myself, my lungs basically do their own thing. All the better for me, I suppose; the less work I have to do on top of college, the better.
Now that I do think about oxygen, however, it seems to me that our dependence on it is quite annoying. Think about all the things we can't do without assistance because we're so oxygen-dependant: scuba-diving, snorkeling, spelunking, and space exploration all require some form of oxygen tank or method of obtaining oxygen. Wouldn't all those things be so much more fun if we didn't have unwieldy stuff strapped to ourselves the entire time?
What's more, we are constantly threatened by dangers such as carbon-monoxide poisoning and lung damage because we breathe in order to absorb oxygen. How many movies have you seen where some sort of deadly gas is being released into a room or a car or something, and the protagonist is racing against time to thwart the villain because he'll eventually have to breathe in? Our potential vulnerability due to this weakness has even caused certain security companies to create carbon-monoxide monitors, which we then have to buy in order to be safe, wasting precious money that could be used on a myriad other things if we didn't need oxygen so badly.
That said, there are benefits to oxygen, and the benefits far outweigh any minor inconveniences. The thing that immediately comes to mind for me is fire, or, more specifically, burning things. Think back, for a moment, to science class: I assume that at some point your teacher did the experiment where you use a vacuum pump to suck the oxygen out of a glass jar with a candle inside? The candle goes out because there's no oxygen in the jar; in a sense, fire is as dependant on oxygen as we are.
When you think about it, a lot of what we do involves using fire to heat or burn things at some point or another. When I cook, for instance, I must light a fire. What would happen to the culinary industry if oxygen wasn't there to help start the fire? (Actually, I'd probably be eating a lot more sushi, which would be awesome and a good deal healthier than my current diet, but that's neither here nor there.) Another example is power. My laptop is currently connected by a power cord to a surge protector, which is connected to the wall, and, eventually, links up with whatever power plant supplies energy to my college's residence halls. I'm fairly certain that said power plant generates electricity by burning something, though I'm not sure specifically what.
In retrospect, I suppose oxygen is something like a double-edged sword. While our need for it can often be frustrating, it makes life a little more livable at the same time.
The Rundown
Convenience: 6/10. We can find oxygen in most places we need to go, but for extra exploration, special gear is needed. Also, oxygen makes things rust, which isn't convenient at all.
Necessity: 10/10. We need it to live. Can't get by without it.
Helpfulness: 10/10. Cooking food, combustion engines, and certain kinds of power plants wouldn't be possible without fire, which, in turn, wouldn't be possible without oxygen.
Ease of Absorption: 10/10. Like I said, it pretty much just happens.
Overall: 9/10. Yep. Oxygen's pretty sweet.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Microsoft's Windows Vista Customer Service Website and Policy
I'll be the first to admit that this post is as much a personal vendetta as it is a review. I am frustrated about this topic, and I feel that this website is the most adequate way to both vent to and inform my readers about the dangers of buying a computer with Windows Vista installed on it-- or, more specifically, perhaps, the dangers of not carefully reading fine print.
First of all, let me clear something up. Aside from a few problems that probably wouldn't bother the average computer-user, I generally like Windows Vista. In particular, I think the redesigned user interface is both aesthetically pleasing and more efficient than that of Windows XP, or any prior Windows UI for that matter. (Dating back to Windows 95, that is; that was the first time I personally had used anything other than DOS.) As long as you plan on buying and using current, mass-marketed software, you'll be perfectly happy with Vista.
However, as you'll have noticed if you read the large, bold print above this review, it is not Windows Vista itself that I am crusading against. It is Microsoft's incredibly lacking and generally idiotic customer service policy concerning Vista.
The problems I've had that require customer service have generally dealt with compatibility. As I said earlier, this won't be a problem at all as long as the software you're using is fairly current (and, therefore, probably designed with Vista in mind). I, however, have several older programs that I rely on that haven't worked so well on Vista, and have, therefore, had to contact (or attempt to contact, but I'll get to that later) Microsoft's customer service department several times.
Before I continue, let me say that I consider myself a decent composer (of music, that is). However, I have fairly limited knowledge of musical theory, and I therefore rely on a certain program (Anvil Studio, which is an excellent little gem of a program that you can find easily enough by using a search engine) in order to write whatever songs may pop into my head. Before I owned the computer I am currently using, I ran Anvil Studio on Windows XP with great success. When I got my new computer, one of the first things I did was install Anvil.
Unfortunately, however, the program didn't run so well. I'd manage to keep it open for around twenty seconds or so before it would freeze and subsequently crash my computer. Frustrated, I went to the Vista customer service site and initiated a chatroom conversation with one of the representatives. While I do not have a record of what was said, I distinctly remember that it was immediately suggested that I downgrade to Windows XP if I wanted to run the program. No matter how many times I spoke to the person, I was repeatedly referred to another department where they could instruct me on how to remove Vista from my computer.
I, however, had just paid for Vista. I didn't want to remove it, I wanted it to work. Therefore, I instead contacted the support people over at the Anvil Studio website. They fixed my problem in a quick and expedient manner, and, while Anvil still doesn't run as well on Vista, it no longer crashes.
Unfortunately, I'm afraid that that was merely the first in a string of apparently unresolvable compatibility problems I've since encountered-- once again, all with rather dated software, mind you. It is, however, the most recent issue that has vexed me the most, and which was the catalyst that led to me writing what I write now.
I do not just write music for the sake of writing it. I also consider myself an amateur computer game designer, although I'm not nearly as skilled in that as I am in music composition. (Incidentally, it is worth noting here that all the songs I write are in midi format; that is, all the sound is generated from the computer's sound card.) I often use the songs I write in the games I create; I find it more convenient than having to obtain permission from someone else.
Ever since switching to Vista, I've noticed that my games have occasionally been plagued by severe slowdown that gradually fades away the more I play. Initially, I assumed that it was the software I used to create the games, but I eventually discovered a connection between the complexity of the midi I was using and the slowdown affecting the games. (In other words, the more complicated the song, the worse the game would perform.)
Figuring that the problem had to do with my computer's ability to play the songs rather than the game-making software, I decided to check and see whether or not other people were suffering from the same issue. It didn't take too much forum-scanning to realize that anyone who worked with midi music on Vista seemed to be having similar troubles; apparently, the technical lingo for it is 'clock drift', though I'm still not precisely sure what that means.
At any rate, with some additional searching, I managed to find the source of my woes. Apparently, "[t]his problem occurs because the Dmusic.sys file was removed in Windows Vista." (http://support.microsoft.com/kb/943253; italics mine.) The webpage goes on to say, essentially, that Dmusic.sys is basically integral to properly playing back midis, and that when it was removed, they didn't add a replacement. Why they removed said file is beyond me.
Fortunately, however, the support site also provided a hotfix. Unfortunately, when I installed said hotfix, it didn't actually do anything, near as I can tell. So I decided to go back to the support page, intent on sending an e-mail requesting an explanation-- after all, I could've somehow installed it wrong.
I never did find out whether or not it was my fault.
Why, you might ask?
As it turns out, I only recieve "no-charge support" for the first ninety days after I've bought my computer. After that, any phone call, e-mail, or chat with a customer service rep I have costs me.
How much, you might also ask?
$59.00, "plus total applicable taxes per support request." (http://support.microsoft.com/oas/default.aspx?ln=en-us&prid=10295&gprid=436647.)
Maybe you didn't quite let that sink in; I'll say it again:
It costs me $59 to ask Microsoft a question.
A question.
I found that to be a little absurd, personally.
So absurd, in fact, that I spent the next few hours researching different possible versions of Linux to install on this computer instead of Vista, just to see whether or not their support website was any better than Microsoft's.
Once again, let me reiterate: I still generally like Windows Vista as an OS. I think it has a lot of potential. That said, I would not reccomend tht you buy it unless you absolutely have to until they work out all the bugs. If you do wind up having to buy it, make sure you report even the smallest complaints to customer service.
If you don't, it'll come back to haunt you.
The Rundown
Ease of Use: 1/10. It took far too long to find the hotfix I'd been looking for. In fact, it took far too long to find just about everything I've ever looked for on Microsoft's support website.
Confidence: 0/10. If the support reps aren't confident enough to reccomend sticking with their own product, why should I?
Cost: 0/10. Simple support via e-mail should be free. I doubt Bill Gates is hard-up for money.
Effectiveness: 0/10. The one thing they sent me to fix my problem didn't even work.
Overall: .25/10. Congratulations! This support service has just become my lowest-scoring review so far!
First of all, let me clear something up. Aside from a few problems that probably wouldn't bother the average computer-user, I generally like Windows Vista. In particular, I think the redesigned user interface is both aesthetically pleasing and more efficient than that of Windows XP, or any prior Windows UI for that matter. (Dating back to Windows 95, that is; that was the first time I personally had used anything other than DOS.) As long as you plan on buying and using current, mass-marketed software, you'll be perfectly happy with Vista.
However, as you'll have noticed if you read the large, bold print above this review, it is not Windows Vista itself that I am crusading against. It is Microsoft's incredibly lacking and generally idiotic customer service policy concerning Vista.
The problems I've had that require customer service have generally dealt with compatibility. As I said earlier, this won't be a problem at all as long as the software you're using is fairly current (and, therefore, probably designed with Vista in mind). I, however, have several older programs that I rely on that haven't worked so well on Vista, and have, therefore, had to contact (or attempt to contact, but I'll get to that later) Microsoft's customer service department several times.
Before I continue, let me say that I consider myself a decent composer (of music, that is). However, I have fairly limited knowledge of musical theory, and I therefore rely on a certain program (Anvil Studio, which is an excellent little gem of a program that you can find easily enough by using a search engine) in order to write whatever songs may pop into my head. Before I owned the computer I am currently using, I ran Anvil Studio on Windows XP with great success. When I got my new computer, one of the first things I did was install Anvil.
Unfortunately, however, the program didn't run so well. I'd manage to keep it open for around twenty seconds or so before it would freeze and subsequently crash my computer. Frustrated, I went to the Vista customer service site and initiated a chatroom conversation with one of the representatives. While I do not have a record of what was said, I distinctly remember that it was immediately suggested that I downgrade to Windows XP if I wanted to run the program. No matter how many times I spoke to the person, I was repeatedly referred to another department where they could instruct me on how to remove Vista from my computer.
I, however, had just paid for Vista. I didn't want to remove it, I wanted it to work. Therefore, I instead contacted the support people over at the Anvil Studio website. They fixed my problem in a quick and expedient manner, and, while Anvil still doesn't run as well on Vista, it no longer crashes.
Unfortunately, I'm afraid that that was merely the first in a string of apparently unresolvable compatibility problems I've since encountered-- once again, all with rather dated software, mind you. It is, however, the most recent issue that has vexed me the most, and which was the catalyst that led to me writing what I write now.
I do not just write music for the sake of writing it. I also consider myself an amateur computer game designer, although I'm not nearly as skilled in that as I am in music composition. (Incidentally, it is worth noting here that all the songs I write are in midi format; that is, all the sound is generated from the computer's sound card.) I often use the songs I write in the games I create; I find it more convenient than having to obtain permission from someone else.
Ever since switching to Vista, I've noticed that my games have occasionally been plagued by severe slowdown that gradually fades away the more I play. Initially, I assumed that it was the software I used to create the games, but I eventually discovered a connection between the complexity of the midi I was using and the slowdown affecting the games. (In other words, the more complicated the song, the worse the game would perform.)
Figuring that the problem had to do with my computer's ability to play the songs rather than the game-making software, I decided to check and see whether or not other people were suffering from the same issue. It didn't take too much forum-scanning to realize that anyone who worked with midi music on Vista seemed to be having similar troubles; apparently, the technical lingo for it is 'clock drift', though I'm still not precisely sure what that means.
At any rate, with some additional searching, I managed to find the source of my woes. Apparently, "[t]his problem occurs because the Dmusic.sys file was removed in Windows Vista." (http://support.microsoft.com/kb/943253; italics mine.) The webpage goes on to say, essentially, that Dmusic.sys is basically integral to properly playing back midis, and that when it was removed, they didn't add a replacement. Why they removed said file is beyond me.
Fortunately, however, the support site also provided a hotfix. Unfortunately, when I installed said hotfix, it didn't actually do anything, near as I can tell. So I decided to go back to the support page, intent on sending an e-mail requesting an explanation-- after all, I could've somehow installed it wrong.
I never did find out whether or not it was my fault.
Why, you might ask?
As it turns out, I only recieve "no-charge support" for the first ninety days after I've bought my computer. After that, any phone call, e-mail, or chat with a customer service rep I have costs me.
How much, you might also ask?
$59.00, "plus total applicable taxes per support request." (http://support.microsoft.com/oas/default.aspx?ln=en-us&prid=10295&gprid=436647.)
Maybe you didn't quite let that sink in; I'll say it again:
It costs me $59 to ask Microsoft a question.
A question.
I found that to be a little absurd, personally.
So absurd, in fact, that I spent the next few hours researching different possible versions of Linux to install on this computer instead of Vista, just to see whether or not their support website was any better than Microsoft's.
Once again, let me reiterate: I still generally like Windows Vista as an OS. I think it has a lot of potential. That said, I would not reccomend tht you buy it unless you absolutely have to until they work out all the bugs. If you do wind up having to buy it, make sure you report even the smallest complaints to customer service.
If you don't, it'll come back to haunt you.
The Rundown
Ease of Use: 1/10. It took far too long to find the hotfix I'd been looking for. In fact, it took far too long to find just about everything I've ever looked for on Microsoft's support website.
Confidence: 0/10. If the support reps aren't confident enough to reccomend sticking with their own product, why should I?
Cost: 0/10. Simple support via e-mail should be free. I doubt Bill Gates is hard-up for money.
Effectiveness: 0/10. The one thing they sent me to fix my problem didn't even work.
Overall: .25/10. Congratulations! This support service has just become my lowest-scoring review so far!
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